linkage

"Advocates also claimed that using the alpacas' fleece for knitted and woven items would energize the textile industry and eliminate the nation's dependence on foreign- produced ponchos."

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/congress_to_raise_alpacas_to_aid

"is it the greatest achievement of mankind thus far or..."

http://eater.com/archives/2008/01/great_moments_i_1.php

I think I suddenly understand statistics.

http://www.aclevercookie.com/rap-lyrics-explained-with-charts-and-graphs/

it's been daaaaaaaaaaaaaaays!

ok so i haven't posted in a hundred years. I'VE BEEN BUSY, PEOPLE! But here's a recap.

Ummmm last night I saw Roundabout's production of Sunday in the Park with George... with Bret, at Studio 54. I know that's sort of confusing since I was neither in the park or with george... but regardless, it was AMAZING. I seriously started crying somewhere near the end of the first act, took a break during intermission, which wasn't excessively emotional, and then started crying again at the v. beginning of act two and pretty much didn't stop until I got on the subway to go home. It was really really really fantastic. I'm not even a Sondheim buff or anything. Bret informed me that the two main actors, who were fucking amazing, both one Olivier's for their roles in the London Production and I would be surprised if the Tony awards didn't follow suit this year. It was just really really amazing.

In other news, I have the world's most boring job this week. I'm receptioning at a place where the offices are like, pretend, and the phone never rings, and the computer I'm typing on this very second has a problem where internet explorer just randomly opens itself times 12,000 windows and it's a big mess. Yesterday, porn wouldn't stop popping up. I was freaking out. I got back from lunch and there were 72 porno windows open. Not exactly the impression I was trying to make, not that I really want to work here ever again. During our torrential downpour this morning, rain was falling on my head through the ghetto skylight above my head. Kari said it best in one of our many email conversations from the past two days... "you might as well be standing out on the street pretending there is a phone you ahve to pick up. thats what it sounds like where you are!!!" Genius, Miss Kari! THe stupidest part is my temp agency like, desperately wants me to go permanent here. I think they've had like a million temps hate it here. But they've totally never pushed me to go permanent anywhere, so it's super bizarre that they want me to do it at the worst offices in the history of the world. No thank you!

Ummmm lets seeeee... oh, in other news, BRANDON IS MAKING HIMSELF USEFUL!
he deposited a sizable portion of money in my account yesterday... and apologized to people he's fucked with in my life. Out of control, what will happen next? Oh... a flying pig just came through the ghetto skylight!

Tonight is Kendall's birthday so we're all going to Dos Caminos to celebrate... hooray! Should be fun, so excited about margaritas!

Tomorrow I'm helping Kyle out on a shoot for /... definitely really excited about that!

My camera is malfunctioning, I'm looking for a new one... until then maybe I'll take blackberry pictures... I'll try to get one of this retarded office that I will hopefully never return to. Thank god for emails from kari and brooksie and my dad! That's the only thing keeping me sane... well, sort of sane.

"I'm not trying to be creepy, but..."

OHMYGOD I MET MATTHEW BARNEY.

If you don't know who he is, google him... or goodle Drawing Restraint. Or the Cremaster Cycle...
I saw the entire Guggenheim taken over by Mr. Barney when I visited NYC for the very first time, with my father. I had never known art like that existed before, and I was fascinated. I also kind of hated it. But At least I felt something... which I think it really important in art. ANyway, after reading tons of literature related to the cremaster cycle, sitting down for all 5 long films, and writing papers on it, I really really love matthew barney and the whole project. He's one of the top five people I would like to meet in my life... aaaaand I did!!!!

Kyle and I went to the New Museum on the Bowery... I'll elaborate more on that disaster later... but as we were walking through the galleries he pointed out a man with his little girl and said "There's matthew barney." Since he stars in his films, I recognized him immediately and was starstruck. It was definitely a bigger deal to me than if it had been Tom Cruise or something. His little girl, daughter of he and partner/muse Bjork, was adorable and he was just wandering around looking at the artwork and she was running around being cute. We ended up getting on the elevator at the same time and i totally froze, I couldn't say anything... so we followed them around the galleries for a while before I could finally get up the courage to say something to him... I knew I'd totally regret it if I didn't... so i just walked up and blurted out "I'm really not trying to be creepy, I just wanted to let you know that the Cremaster Cycle changed everything about the way I think about art... I saw it in the Guggenheim when I was like, 16, and I just wanted to thank you... ok bye" And I was SHAKING so much and he said "thanks, amazing" and I walked away and was like "OK Kyle we have to go!!!!" Basically it was really exciting.

Now... the New Museum? the architecture is really really cool, the galleries themselves could be so amazing... if the art in them didn't suck. At the end our freshman year when we lived in the dorms, everybody through out their shitty art projects from the year... from all of our core classes- 2D, Color Theory, 3D... so all the trash cans were overflowing with bad art projects made of pasta or string or like, garbage... and spraypaint and collage... just like, horrible artwork that we all knew was bad and had no place in an apt much less in a gallery. Well, it appeared that someone collected all this shitty garbage art work and put it in this great space. It was really dissapointing because it had been hyped so much, soooo many articles about the opening of this museum and stuff... I'm hoping that it will improve because this isn't someplace I would want to return again and again like MOMA or the Met... I'll post a picture I wasn't supposed to take later.

Kyle and I went from there to Chelsea to visit the Gladstone Gallery (Barney's representation), Gagosian, and others... nothing very good going on really, but it was nice to spend the afternoon looking.

Last night I worked at La Sirene then just came home... relatively tame weekend. Tonight it's La Sirene again, or maybe hanging out with Brandon... we shall see how that goes. Hopefully both will be lucrative? haha... yeah.

lots of quotation marks

thursday night at tailor was good... i tried the "solid" cocktails... super fun. i love how creative the boys at tailor are, it's great to see people having so much fun with their restaurant but still being professional... in my history, most of the people having fun with their restaurants were sleeping with a lot of hostesses and doing a lot of illegal things... i loooove the cocktail the "waylon" which is pretty simple compared to a lot of their designer drinks- "smoked" coke and bourbon... really good. vicky ordered "something fruity involving champagne" and the bartender made her a really good... really girly martini... but way better than most because the fruit flavoring tasted so fresh and real. the guys from the kitchen (incl. sam mason) sat near us at the bar drinking pbr... i wish i wasn't an idiot and had the courage to be like "hey, i really like what you're doing here..."... which doesn't seem like that difficult of a thing to say... but I think I've worked in enough restaurants where I was annoyed with the girls at the bar hitting on the owners/ chefs where I don't want to be/appear to be "that girl". Whatever. I'm a regular, sort of, and I don't mean to be a groupie, so it shouldn't be such a big deal.
After Tailor vicky and I went to Kiosk, the worst bar I've ever been to. It was like, everyone who's ever subscribed to Nylon magazine got together with a lot of stretchy sequined tube tops and decided to have an annoying photoshoot. Vicky and I danced ridiculously for like 10 minutes and then literally ran out of the bar.

I saw Brand today, the first time in over a week... always interesting. He ended up spending the day here, and I haven't processed the whole thing yet. I'm really worried about him, even after everything. I don't want him to be sick or to be really depressed or anything... it's weird really caring about someone but knowing there probably isn't anything you can do for them... and knowing that for my own good I shouldn't even try anymore... Things will probably never be ok for us... but somehow we still aren't out of each other's lives. It's actually a really messy situation... and i don't know the solution to it really...

Tonight Ian and I had dinner at Artisanal for restaurant week. We had a great temperanillo, and the hanger steak was good... as was the dessert cheese plate. I think I'd like to go back and just eat cheese and drink wine next time. It's definitely a cool place... reminded me a lot of Paris! I'm still up in the air about how I feel about restaurant week though. It was good to have a mellow night though, and to get dressed up a little bit! It's always fun to see Ian, too, because it's so comfortable! I don't have to pretend to be anyone else or try to impress him cause he's known me for so freaking long!

On the train ride home I met these boys who asked me to meet them at Joe's Pizza at 2:30 am because I "looked like a cool chick." One of the boys informed me that he had been at his father's show tonight, and that his dad is Black Sheep who does that song "it's like this... it's like that...". I'm not sure that was true. Needless to say, I'm not going to Joe's Pizza to meet them although the last time I went out with strangers I met on the subway (like 3 days ago), I had a really good time. I'm not quite sure what Joe's pizza is and I have brunch plans at 11 and would like to be alert!

Tomorrow I'm having brunch with Kyle then going to the New Museum... I'm pretty excited cause I haven't seen Kyle in a while and I've reallllllly been wanting to go check out this museum. Kyle asked me to help out with the styling on a shoot for / on thursday and I'm really excited, actually. Can't wait to hear about what he's been up to! I think Kyle is one of the most successful, impressive people I went to scad with and I know he's really going to do amazing things... but I feel like he was already on that path pre-scad! His magazine / is really really great and he's been publishing it on his own forever... ya'll should all check it out.

Ok, I think it's bedtime... or Joe's Pizza time... but I'm pretty sure bed.

obsessed

http://www.aclevercookie.com/rap-lyrics-explained-with-charts-and-graphs/

and

white russian breakfast cereal.

oh the night and i, what a pair!!!

it's been a week... i feel guilty for not posting it all cause i think i'm starting to lose some of it! where to start...
i think it was two nights ago... i was devastatingly bored and went all the way uptown to 110th and amsterdam (!!!) to meet ian at 1020 which was fun...even though he kept saying the wrong thing like that I'll never play anything but the best friend and that I'll have to break "rules" to date a hot man... or something to that effect... whatever that even means. I think it was the beer? Hopefully? Anyway, it doesn't matter... but they were also showing "Stranger than Fiction" which makes me cry... not a good choice for bar movie, but a really really good movie. We headed out around 12 and i got on the subway and got my book out to read on the longish ride home.

Halfway there this group of Australians called me over and I guess I was tipsy enough at the time to think it was a great idea to take them up on their invitation to come out with them in Chelsea! So I went with Sam, Dave, and friends (I had a little bit to drink, give me a break for not remembering all the names! to Cielo... I have no clue where that is located. These people were actually really really fun. They had all met eachother in a Hostel here in the city and so were virtually strangers as well... except they were all from Australia... except for the one random guy who was from somewhere in S. America (I think)... We were all dancing at Cielo when I met a German boy, Johann and I guess I danced with him for a while before we started making out... I did manage to learn that he's from Hamburg... and is a photographer... but it was loud and we were drinking and making out seemed to be the right thing to do at the moment.

Surprisingly enough, everyone facebooked me the next day, so that's fun... I am super glad I decided to go out with all of them because they really were a good time... but I got home super late...

The next day I met up with Kate, the stylist for Paper City, and we picked out jewelry and hats for wednesday's shoot. We got a lot of pretty things, and I even got to look at the Fendi collection and help pick out a few dresses, one of which we actually used... so moving up... slightly!

Yesterday was the actual photo shoot... and I was a disaster the entire time. I definitely didn't get enough sleep the night before so I completely overslept, was almost 3 hours late to the studio... and was just totally out of it all day which sucks, because I like doing these shoots so much. The clothes were really great though, and I know kate had to work super hard to get it all because the day before she had told me we had like 5 looks... we ended up with a ton of great stuff... great fendi dresses, beautiful Vera Wang pieces, an amazing cover gown by Carolina Herrera... really fun, artsy looking dresses for the art issue. But early in the day we decided against a Michael kors dress and belt combo and i had the messenger pick them up and return them to the Kors office... welllll it turns out the belt was armani and at about 7 at night, we really really needed it. And we couldn't get it back. So I totally fucked up and sent the belt back to the wrong designer before we could shoot it with the terrible Armani outfit we absolutely HAD to shoot. Such a mess. I'm such an idiot! I really did feel like the stupidest person in the world because I know that belt would have made the shoot a lot better and I didn't want Kate to get any shit from her boss because the outfit was horrible... I mean, it was an honest mistake but I should have been more conscientious. And the outfit would have been also horrible with the belt, it was bloomers for the love of God, but the belt definitely would've helped... Sooooo I hope the picture still looked ok and that Kate will use me again next month... but it didn't help that I was 3 hours late and sent this important piece back!!!

Anywayyyyy we finished the shoot and I headed home to find out that our electricity had been turned off cause seriously, I'm such an idiot lately... so I stayed at Vicky and Kari's, and Brooksie stayed at a friend's apartment too... and I stayed up waiting on hold all night with Con Edison to pay the bill... but when I got back home this morning the electricity was back on, thank god... and I don't think I'll ever make that mistake again... whatever mistake I made... because last months bill was definitely paid and so I don't think they were supposed to turn it off when I'm just a few days late on this bill! But whatever... they did, I paid, it's taken care of...

I ran last minute errands for Paper City today and went to Trader Joes... apparently they don't have a line at 10 am! And I cleaned the apartment some and did 35 lbs of laundry... It's been a pretty productive day, actually. I don't have work for tomorrow so I think I'll try to finish the cleaning and maybe sleep in a little... because it's been a few days since I've been able to do that... at least since I was able to do it on purpose!

Tonight I think I'm gonna meet up with Vicky at Tailor if she ever gets done with dinner... Brandon tried to get me to come to Vintage and taste the menu he's created but I feel weird going in there a.) knowing he says a lot of shit about me to his coworkers and b.) by myself... I would like to try his new menu. There are a couple reviews written by customers online and there aren't a lot of people that seem very happy. It isn't really the food exactly people are complaining about... maybe it's the manager's fault? Not really sure what the deal is... I guess it's not really my problem. I do really hope things go well for brandon, in the end. I mean, karma is gonna be a bitch but I don't want to hear that he's homeless or hurt or anything like that... but I can't do anything else to help at this point...

Sooooo fingers crossed vicky hurries up so we can get a drink at Tailor... this is what they're up to right now: http://nymag.com/daily/food/2008/01/eben_freeman_turns_his_cocktai_1.html
Always something really creative happening at Tailor, and it's only a block away! So convenient.

This weekend should be good... dinner at Artisanal with Ian for restaurant week tomorrow, then probably out to Le Royale to dance... Saturday I'm going to the New Museum and brunch with Kyle, then working at La Sirene at night... Hopefully tomorrow night will yield something good to write about. Maybe we should meet people at hostels...

apparently con edison likes to be paid on time

i'm an idiot and didn't pay my electric bill even though i've said "I need to pay the electric bill" to brooksie every day for the past 2 weeks... so today they turned off my electricity. OHMYGOD I am so stupid! So I'm spending the night at Vicky and Kari's because my apt is very very dark. It'll be back on in the morning, thank god, and I will post a loooong update of the past two messy days. And I will get my life together and make sure this year is as good as it is supposed to be and that I don't just waste it getting wasted. I'm too old and have been living on my own for way too long to let stupid things like this happen!

"i spent two years on food network, if that didn't turn my head to mush i don't know what would"

The new season of Anthony Bourdain's show No Reservations on Travel Channel is so funny. I totally want to travel with Mr. Bourdain. Actually lately I really want to travel in general. I fucking love New York City. Obviously. I basically want to live here forever. And while I hate to leave manhattan, I don't think it's so bad on a plane... I saw an ad for 159 dollar flight to London on a banner today and almost bought a ticket right there... But then I realized that was kinda retarded.
Anyway, i just went off subject. I don't know why I'm watching so many cooking shows lately! Maybe because I have reasons to cook again... and i won't feel so judged like when Brandon was around critiquing every fucking move I made in the kitchen. I just typed a whole paragraph elaborating on how messed up it was that he would be such an asshole about me cooking... and deleted it cause nobody wants to read that. You're welcome!

In The Key of Awesome (now with pictures)

Oook so last night I worked at La Sirene until like 10... we were super busy but they were a quick and early crowd so... basically, perfect. Except for the bitchy 20th birthday table that didn't know how to tip... she gave me 125 bucks on 117 dollar bill and said keep the change. I very nicely brought the change to her and acted like I hadn't heard her say to keep it and said "here is your change, it's 8 dollars. Have a really happy birthday!" at which point she counted the money, said something to her little friends, then left the restaurant. What the fuck? I definitely didn't do anything wrong. She was just a bitch.

After work, I headed over to Pianos on the Lower East Side to meet Vicky and Kari for Andrew WK. First of all, the easiest and quickest way to get there is in a cab. i couldve walked even but it was like, 12 degrees outside. Literally. Anyway, when i get there i had to wait in line for like 5 minutes ( i hate lines) and when I get to the doorman, he looks at my id and looks at me and then sends me to another guy to have my id scanned. The guy looks at my id and laughs. I was like "Uh.. what?" He informs me that my id is clearly fake. WHAT? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? My id is definitely not fake. I inform him of this. I am 23 years old. My fake id years are definitely over. He laughs, scans my id, it doesn't scan. Yeah, nobody knows why. He informs me that I am not getting into that bar, but luckily gives me my id back. At this point, I was obviously livid. I mean, it would be one thing if i was underage, and using a fake id. I'd be thrilled to get my id back and I'd just leave quietly. BUT I'M LEGAL AND MY ID IS REAL. So they get a manager, who agrees that my Georgia drivers license is obviously a fake. WHAT!? It was like a conspiracy. Finally I mention that I have a prepurchased ticket waiting for me inside and somehow that was like the magic password and they let me in. Seriously? It was totally ridiculous.

Sooooo I got in, I was still mad, I got a drink, and we went into the part of the bar where the music was... in like, a back room. It sort of smelled like the trashroom of a sushi bar and was a million degrees but we scored a good spot in the front and after the first band that consisted of a lot of guitar and grunting, we sat on the steps leading up to the stage for Andrew WK to perform. his performance was really short, but actualy really good... very different than the limited about of songs i'd heard by him before. He was like... devendra meets tori amos last night. Def. a weird combo... or maybe not. Afterwards we stayed so Vicky could meet him and give him her business card... portraits anyone? I'll upload pictures as soon as I get them from the girls.

After that we left Pianos and went to Libation, which I hated. I think maybe I just wasn't in a club mood. It was sunday, after all... whatever that means. So we downed our drinks there and went for nachos at... I don't know the name... and talked about other people for a long time as vicky dozed off... then we all hopped in a cab and went home... Soooo I made it home by 4 for once! This week should be a busy one. Tonight I'm working at La Sirene again, tomorrow and wednesday I'm assissting on a paper city shoot... and i don't know yet about thursday and friday. We'll see! Stay tuned for pictures.

Lent

i'm giving up mixers for lent. and i'm starting early. i don't remember when i decided i should add diet to my jack on the rocks but that has officially stopped.
tonight was absurd, i'll write about it tomorrow.
goodniiight.

Momofuku, Niagara, Botanica

Last night Vicky and I went to Momofuku Noodle Bar in the East Village and it was seriously one of the best meals I've had since I've lived here. We ordered waaaay too much food and spent too much money but it was a totally enjoyable dinner so whatever. We had Pork Dumplings... which were out of control delicious. They were like soft pillowy clouds from heaven. I can't even explain them. We also had shrimp and grits which were fine, esp with the thick cut bacon and the perfectly poached egg. The sweetbreads were fried really nicely... crisp and delicious and not greasy at all... and came with a really good sweet chilli sauce... That was enough food for the two of us but somehow the waitress convinced us we needed a noodle bowl that was MASSIVE but amazing... pork neck with nice thick noodles and a great broth. We drank huge Orions with our meal and sitting at the bar was fun cause we could check out the cute chefs... which we were probably ridiculously obvious about.

Later we went to Niagara which was nearby... it was whatever. Very crowded with a mix of annoying NYU students, v. drunk girls who apparantly thought vicky and i wanted to fight, and then more laid back east village boys mixed in randomly... We met a cool group of guys from Brooklyn though and hung out with them for a while at loud niagra before moving on with them to Botanica in Nolita... much better! Def. more low key and more amusing, with singular drunk girl dancing on the benches and random drunk men falling onto our table. And the world's most random DJ. We got in a cab to go home after last call sooooo basically it was another good night!

Today I've done... nothing so far. This is the most productive I've been so far... Vick and I talked about going to a Taschen book sale... but I have to work at La Sirene in like, 2 hours so we'll see about that.

We're supposed to go see Andrew WK tonight (haha) if I get off work in time but I think we might be busy (hopefully) cause tomorrow is a holiday for a lot of people here.Sooooo we'll see!

btw the real housewives of orange county are really fucking annoying.

people shouldn't be lying assholes

just a personal observation.
and if someone else's parents pay your rent you should probably find a way to pay them back.

Le Royale (part 1 I'm sure)

Last night at Le Royale (on LeRoy street... we just made the connection last night) was so amazing. It was like the olden days at the Jinx. But more expensive. And a way better DJ that nobody we know has slept with.... so the mystery is still there! As expected, Kari ran into someone she knew and screamed a lot, and we did shots of Southern Comfort. And Vicky and I found ourselves dancing like idiots on the stage for a while. And, also like the olden days, we were the last ones standing along with friendly intern Chris from vicky's work. ANYWAY the music was fantastic- seriously, their friday night Robot Rock party is so much fun. And unlike so many New York clubs, not pretentious! But unlike the Jinx... not dirty. Soooo it's like the perfect mix of everything.
However, we could not find 24 hour sushi to save our lives. Not even sushi open past the bars. Blue Ribbon is open until 4, like sushi zen, but bars close at 4 and we couldn't be expected to stop dancing early, right? Soooo we found ourselves at a diner on 6th ave in the village that I can't remember the name... eating calamari and eggs benedict at 4:30 in the morning. PERFECT.
Oh and you know what else is great? No stupid stamps on our hands!!! And the coat check girl is actually nice.
This was our third friday at Le Royale and I don't see any reason we won't be there most fridays from now on.

It turns out 23 is not old. That we can still dance and have fun and not be serious and worry all the goddamn time. It turns out things are really going to be ok. Better than ok even. There's really no reason life shouldn't be one big dance party.

Newest Obsession

Ohmygod way better than food network is this:
http://www.onnetworks.com/videos/dinner-with-the-band
It's Sam Mason (of my fave broome st. restaurant/bar/dessert situation Tailor) hosting a cooking show... with bands. And the food seems like stuff we'd all like (except i don't know about avacado margaritas, that sounds horrible) and like stuff I'd be capable of making without too much stress. Aaaaaaand if the olive cobbler is anything like his amazing clafouti at Tailor, then I'm attempting it asap.
and he's hot and funny and the bands are good.
why isn't this actually on tv? I think they could take one of Rachel Ray's disasters off the air for a season...

Adventures in Temping, pt. 1

OK, So today I'm working as a receptionist at a talent agency. I've worked here before, so at least I kind of know what I'm doing but they're super intense and sometimes the phone rings a whole lot and sometimes it doesn't ring at all and then I get super bored. But everything is always like, an issue here... some kind of drama. Like when people take their lunchbreak is equivilant to a matter of national security. It's interesting though... I can't wait until I come back here for representation, not for reception...
The stupid thing is that my gmail doesn't work. It's like, the only webpage that doesn't function... igoogle works, this works... but not gmail. Whatever.
This is not a very exciting temporary adventure, not that any of them really are... but some are more amusing than others. I am here till seven so maybe something will happen... fingers crossed.

hahaaaa

this is going to be dumb but i think it's high time... this will make it way easier to keep in touch and remember all the ridiculous stuff that's been happening to little me in the big bad city... and give me something to do when i'm temping! we joke all the time about how freaking unlucky i am but i sort of think it's the opposite... i mean, things could really be sooooo much worse!